Habits That Kill Your Motivation As Per Told By A Counselor

It is not unusual to sometimes feel that your motivation towards achieving your objectives and goals is weakening as time goes by. That is normal. At some instances in your life, you will face certain emotionally, physically, and mentally draining challenges. There will come a time that you will feel stuck in the depths of misery and stress, and these cause you the inability to move forward. Various reasons affect your motivation, and each one of them depends on how you accept and react to them. However, there are still those common factors that can easily impact your motivation, and here are quite a few of those.

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Comparing Your Achievements With Others

Comparing your achievements with others is an old case in the book. Everyone knows how damaging this habit is, and it can easily kill your motivation up until the last string. Comparing sidetracks you from doing what you got to do because you will get too attached to other people’s success. Eventually, you will become more insecure and doubtful about your capabilities. Over time, constantly comparing yourself fosters negative feelings such as jealousy, resentments, and discontentment. And when you focus more on these negative emotions, you will eventually lose sight of what’s more important, which is your goal and objectives for success. Thus, do not compare yourself with others because your success still awaits you. Instead, your attention should be intact on the purpose of personal success.

Creating A Shortcut To The Final Goal

Usually, the part that keeps you motivated to achieve your goals involves a lot of processes. When you work on the necessary thing you need to accomplish, you get the best of your hard work and perseverance. Unfortunately, when you create a shortcut towards your final goals and objectives, you deprive yourself of learning. You skip the necessary steps to fast-track everything, which leads to uncertainties and unsatisfactory. Sometimes, you get frustrated and exhausted because you won’t be getting the desired result even if you managed to work in the easiest ways. Of course, that is because you won’t have the proper mental and emotional foundation that can better handle pressure and failure once they occur. To avoid that, you need to go and experience the uncertainties and hardships of the process towards success.

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Not Planning Anything

At times it is okay to feel a little lost with your goals. That explains why even if you think you knew what you have to do, you still do not know where to start. Your motivations can easily fall back when you are not following a plan. Working on things without understanding the process and steps can make the whole journey towards success unreachable. When you only think about the result and not the considerations and sacrifices you need to take, you will eventually stop moving forward. But don’t get disheartened. Not planning on anything does not mean you are not bound for success. However, the journey might become more complicated without it, and the obstacles you set yourself might harm your self-confidence and self-awareness.

Always Desiring To Be Perfect

It is okay to set up a standard of what your objectives and goals should look like. Honestly, it is essential to determine what you want to help you focus and keep you motivated. However, if you are working on your goal to make things perfect, that is the problem. Always desiring to be perfect can ruin your sense of satisfaction because it will only make you think you are wasting time and effort, especially when situations are out of control. Unfortunately, the habit of always looking towards perfection is one of the easiest ways to kill your motivation. That is because the idea of getting something based on an extreme and unrealistic standard can make you expect too much. And when your expectations fail you, you get stressed, anxious, and depressed. With that, you reach a point where you become more determined to move away from your goals instead of getting close to them.

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Getting Distracted All The Time

You know you are not motivated enough to do what you do when you easily get distracted by certain things. For example, you can get distracted by a call from a friend, from a loud noise from the television, and even a single notification sound on your phone. These distractions delay you from moving forward and focusing on what’s important in a day. Sadly, distractions are everywhere, and even the best schedules can fail. However, it does not mean they are entirely unavoidable. You can still look for ways to keep your thoughts from off-putting things from your way. As long as you have that breathing space where you allow yourself to be refreshed from time to time, you can put your distractions in place.

 

Counseling 101: Reasons Why You Are Unhappy

 

Have you asked yourself about what makes you happy? Do you find certain interesting things that can make you feel emotionally and mentally good? Because if you can’t, or you don’t clearly know what it is that gives you joy, that is okay. You are not alone in that situation because all individuals feel the same.

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The pursuit of happiness is a life-long struggle. Everyone finds it hard to identify that one thing that makes their lives complete specifically. Yes, you may yearn for wealth, a successful career, a stable relationship, strong friendship, etc. That is because your happiness represents your overall emotional fulfillment. However, the journey towards that is quite exhausting, and often you need to overcome negative feelings such as insecurity, regret, and loneliness. But how can you know if you are unhappy? Here are some of the reasons you might find.

You Tightly Hold Grudges

Happiness is a choice, and one thing that can stop you from getting it is by holding a grudge against some people. When you struggle to forgive and forget a mistake that even the ones you love committed, you will get stuck in a loop of emotional instability. You will end up upset and frustrated with many things, even complain about the small ones that are entirely not that big of a deal. The inability to forgive can bring you so much anger that will linger in your heart. It will make you more vindictive towards other people, bitter about the achievements of others, and unhappy with the world. That emotional stuck will fixate you to a negative experience. It will hinder you from letting go, moving on, and heal from it.

You Become Ungrateful

You can ask yourself now. When was the last moment you felt thankful for the things that you have? Ungratefulness can be bad for your overall well-being as it builds up a negative approach to things. It makes you unappreciative about simple pleasures in life such as getting a good night’s sleep, visiting a beautiful place, eating a delicious meal, and spending time with your loved ones. When you are ungrateful, you opt to take things for granted and will never feel guilty about it. You will not see how good life is, and you will never feel lucky that you get to have things that others can’t obtain until they die at some point in your life.

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You Compare Yourself To Others

At some point, it is genuinely okay to compare yourself to others, especially if you are looking through the difference in a positive way. If the other person turns out to be admirable, that is okay. You can always look up to that and use the positive qualities of that individual as your set goal. However, if those positive attributes by someone else make you feel bad about yourself, that means you are unhappy with whom you are. This type of feeling can bring so many insecurities, self-doubt, and inferiority. And when there are constant social comparisons, it makes you dwell on mental health problems such as anxiety, depression, and chronic loneliness.

You Worry About Everything 

One cause of unhappiness is worry. It makes you think of the unthinkable. For example, you worry too much about what other people think about you, leading to self-doubt and insecurities. Same as you worry about what might go wrong in your day, which causes you a great deal of emotional distress. Worrying can make you feel unreliable, incapable, and unworthy. And sometimes, when those negative feelings become a little out of control, it breeds feelings of tension, dread, anxiety, panic, and depression. Thus, you are only draining your mental and emotional energy by constantly overthinking about being stuck in an imaginary negative situation and causing yourself so much unhappiness.

You’re Surrounded With Toxic People

Negativity is always contagious. That explains why when you spend time with toxic people, you become unhappy almost instantly. With this particular situation, you become powerless in overcoming your self-defeating behavior. These people that are weighing you down should stay out of your life because there’s a tendency that you may fall into the same psychological and problematic behaviors your circle has. Toxic people can influence you to become one of them, and unfortunately, at some point, you can’t notice it from happening. With this, toxic people take charge of everything about you until you give up your control over your life.

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Insight

If you have that habit of constantly searching for mistakes and looking at the downside of everything, you are only creating your own unhappiness. You will only focus more on criticizing and downplay even your best life achievements. You will hate people and will become more drawn to isolation. Therefore, it would help if you use these things on the list as your “not to do” goal to fulfill your genuine happiness.

 

Frequently Asked Questions About SSRIs

 

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SSRIs or Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors are among the most recommended prescribed medications. They have proven to alleviate moderate to severe symptoms of depression, yield lesser side effects compared to other forms of antidepressants, and are more relatively safe.

How They Work

SSRIs manage depression by surging serotonin levels within the brain. Serotonin is one of the neurotransmitters that transmit signals between neurons or brain chemicals. SSRIs work by blocking serotonin’s reuptake into the neurons, making more serotonin more available, thereby improving the transmission of impulses between neurons. These types of antidepressants are selective as they primarily affect serotonin and not the other neurotransmitters.

SSRIs can also be utilized to manage conditions aside from depression, including anxiety disorders.

Precautions and Side Effects

All SSRIs are believed to function in similar methods and generally can produce similar adverse effects, although some individuals may not have any. Several side effects may disappear following the initial weeks of treatment, but others may consult their doctor wanting to try another drug.

If you are unable to bear the effects of SSRI, you might be able to tolerate another drug of a different form because SSRIs vary in their strengths at obstructing serotonin absorption and in the way the body metabolizes the drug.

SSRIs’ possible adverse effects include but are not limited to headaches, dry mouth, insomnia, nausea or diarrhea, dizziness, sexual problems, nervousness or restlessness, or appetite changes, among others. Taking your medications with meals may decrease the risk of nausea. Additionally, as long as your medications do not disrupt your sleep patterns, you can decrease the effect of nausea by consuming it before going to bed.

Whether or not the antidepressant you are taking is the most suitable for you will depend on several concerns, such as the symptoms you experience and other medication or mental health illnesses that you have. Please consult your doctor about your particular SSRI’s typical side effects and learn more about it by reading the patient medication guide that is given to you when the doctor hands you your prescription.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Are SSRIs effective for anxiety?

SSRIs or Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors were developed to manage depression, but they have also effectively treated several anxiety disorders. They have modernized the treatment of anxiety, substituting the long-term use of benzodiazepines. SSRIs can be used to treat phobias, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and PTSD, among others. 

Which SSRI has the least side effects?  

The most tolerated SSRI is citalopram, followed by sertraline, fluoxetine, fluvoxamine, and paroxetine. Fluvoxamine and paroxetine have the most side effects and the highest prevalence rates due to their negative side effects during several clinical trials. 

Which SSRI is most effective?  

The anti-depressant Zoloft is one of the most highly potent SSRIs, even though others have reported diarrhea’s side effects. It is also the most commonly recommended antidepressant, owing to the almost 20% of a survey who claimed to have taken the medication.

Which SSRI is best for insomnia?

Doctors sometimes recommend SSRIs for insomnia. However, most of the SSRIs cause insomnia and even worsen sleep disruption, except for bupropion. It causes stimulation during the day and induces sleep during the nighttime. 

What is the mildest antidepressant?

SSRIs generally produce fewer side effects and are less likely to result in problems when taken in higher doses than other forms of antidepressants. Popular SSRIs known to be the mildest are the combination of Lexapro and Zoloft. 

Which is the newest antidepressant?

The Food and Drug Administration officially sanctioned a new medication for depression last March 5, a fresh breakthrough that has not happened for decades. Esketamine is a drug that is consumed through the nose. It is a derivative of ketamine, an anesthetic that became popular for its amazing antidepressant effects.

What are the top 5 antidepressants?

The top five antidepressants in the market today are Remeron (mirtazapine), Effexor (venlafaxine), Lexapro (escitalopram), Celexa (citalopram), and Zoloft (sertraline). They are known to be the most effective with the least side effects.

What is the best natural antidepressant?  

St. John’s Wort is the most popular natural supplement of all time and has been known to treat depression and mood disorders. Other commonly used natural antidepressants include omega-3 fatty acids and SAM-e. However, if you think that you are experiencing symptoms of depression, you must consult your doctor first before trying these natural antidepressants.

How can I increase serotonin levels naturally?

There are several ways to naturally increase your serotonin, one of which is consuming certain food types. You don’t get serotonin directly by eating the food, though, but you get tryptophan, an amino acid changed to serotonin in the brain. Other natural ways to increase your serotonin levels include exercise, supplements, regular exposure to bright light, and massage.

What vitamin is a natural antidepressant?

Vitamin B12 and folate are known to aid the brain in converting amino acids to powerful brain chemicals like serotonin. Individuals over 60, those with bodies that may not efficiently absorb B vitamins, and those who don’t get sufficient vitamin B in their food, and vegetarians will most likely benefit from these supplements. 

What vitamins help with anxiety?

The ashwagandha is an adaptogenic supplement that has been utilized in Ayurvedic medicine to help treat people with anxiety. Magnesium, vitamin D, L-Theanine, and Valerian root are also potent supplements that help manage anxiety.

What deficiency causes anxiety?

Some studies reveal that when a person has vitamin D deficiency, he may also develop anxiety disorders. For instance, a study done in 2015 reported that those who showed anxiety or depression symptoms incidentally had decreased calcidiol levels, which is a derivative of vitamin D’s breakdown in the body.

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Takeaway 

When deciding what antidepressant to take, your doctor considers your symptoms, other medications you’re taking, any health issues, and what medicines have worked for you previously.

It usually takes a few weeks or even longer before your antidepressant is completely effective and subside the first side effects. Your doctor may suggest some dose alterations or a different antidepressant. However, if you are patient enough, you and your doctor will finally find the perfect medication that works best for you.

 

 

Mental Health 101: If You’re Unhappy And You Know It, Try These Tips

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Do you know how scary it is to know that you are unhappy, but you have no idea what you can do to make it stop?

I do. Throughout my college days, I had been sad about almost every aspect of my life.

For one, my parents decided to split. As it turned out, they had been sleeping in different beds ever since I was in middle school. I merely had no idea because I always slept like a log and would only wake up when both of them were already up. My parents wanted me out of the house before they filed for divorce because they could not bear to see their only child deal with a broken home for years.

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In addition to that, my high school boyfriend and I had to go to different universities. He had a full-ride football scholarship in his dream school, while I got into an Ivy League school. We talked every night on the phone in the first few months, but our communication started to dwindle after some time. Before the semester ended, I found out that he embraced the jock (or should I say ‘jerk’?) life and started sleeping with one woman after another almost every night. Worse, I had to see him pick up women at the bar before realizing why he wasn’t answering my calls anymore.

The fact that I lived in the dorms with a bunch of other girls did not improve my mental health. I did not get lucky in the roommate department since I got stuck with a weed smoker and – pardon my French – a college slut. The smell of the weed, I could still forgive because she always smoked next to the window. But it was horrible to live with a promiscuous young adult who had different guys knocking on our dorm room often. I ended up yelling at the latter when she attempted to have sex with someone, even though we were there.

I knew I was almost on the verge of breaking down when a professor chose me as her most-hated student. Every time we met, she often tried to catch me off guard with her questions, and she was always close to succeeding. But when I learned about my parents’ divorce, I didn’t get to study the night before, so I went to the professor’s class with a blank mind. Though I don’t want to elaborate about the humiliation that I experienced that day, let’s say that it was so bad I wanted to jump off the bridge then.

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Taking Control Of My Mental Health

Despite everything, I was lucky that my best friend lived in a nearby dorm. I called her on that day; I couldn’t even formulate words because of how defeated I felt. Still, she went to my dorm and pulled me to our favorite alfresco café and forced me to tell her everything that bothered me. 

After an hour of listening, my best friend said, “I know you are very emotional to see reason right now. However, I want you to remember that life doesn’t end when your parents divorce, your boyfriend cheats, or your roommates and professors suck. You need to prove now more than ever that their actions only make you stronger.”

My best friend walked me back to the dorm afterward, and I went straight to bed. When I woke up, my best friend’s words came back to me and somehow made me want to take control of my mental health.

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Reversing My Unhappiness

The first thing I did was break up with my boyfriend. I asked him to meet me; he tried to give an alibi, but I said it was urgent, so he had to go. When he saw me, the prick looked surprise after seeing a massive box of mementos that he gifted to me over the years. I would have split with him calmly, but I couldn’t help but smack his face when he acted hurt and asked why I was leaving him. Nevertheless, he backed away when I told him that I knew his cheating habits.

Then, I went home to talk to my parents. Although I was still shocked by their divorce, I had to let them know that they should no longer feel guilty about it. They were not young adults anymore; they had to find their own happiness sooner than later. We cried for some time, but we separated with light hearts.

As for my roommates, I couldn’t do anything with them, so I asked my best friend if she wanted to get an apartment with me in between our universities. She agreed; that’s why I didn’t have roommate problems anymore. 

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Then, since there was only a month left for the semester, I poured all my attention to studying for that nasty professor’s class. I aced every exam she threw at us, so she had no choice but to give me the highest marks. Ha!

Final Thoughts

I believe it makes an entire world of difference when you are aware of your unhappiness. It pushes you to ask for help or figure out how to resolve your problems.

Am I still unhappy? No way! 

The Essence Of Family Dinners

 

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This year has been quite different for our family. My two teenage sons have been spending more time with their friends, which meant that they were not usually around for dinner. But when they are there, and the whole family eats together, I am reminded of the reason why preparing and cooking food for them is worth everything. At this phase of my life, perhaps more than others, I have realized the good in having dinner together as a family.

Family dinners are essential in more ways than one. I am a nutritionist, and I know the importance of healthy and equally flavorful food choices. However, I also am aware of the essence of taking the time to eat together and the advantages that result from gathering as a family. Dinners, mainly, are much more than just what’s on the table. It’s actually about having an environment of love, closeness, practice, and conversations. I think that family dinners have a significant effect on childhood development and close family connections.

 

Family dinners improve connections with each other.

Most families have hectic schedules. Parents work, children are off to school, and all of them have extracurriculars that eat up most of their time. Their activities don’t end at 5 PM, and they do not have an extra two hours to cook and eat dinner. However, we find ways to use our phones for two hours and even more. With all the hustle and bustle, family dinners are a perfect time to put a stop to all other activities and responsibilities and establish connections with one another.

As a mom of two teenage sons, I cherish the time that I spend bonding at the dinner table. Dinners are among the few times that we are all together as a family. According to research, only 50% of modern families have meals together 3 or 4 times a week. It also reveals that a lot of meals take only about 20 minutes and are usually spent in front of the television. Try using family dinners to bond face to face with your kids. Set aside your gadgets and other distractions and concentrate on building relationships with your family members.

 

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Family dinners encourage conversation.

Sensible and consequential conversations require skill, and family dinners are a wonderful practice ground, particularly if you have kids who are not used to make conversation. When you spend time together with your family around the dining table, all family members have the chance to ask about how their day went or to talk about topics that are significant to the family, or to chat about whatever. In our home, our dinners are a channel through which we can listen to our children talk about their activities in school, what they’ve been learning, and how they’re coping with their everyday lives.

If you find it difficult to begin or make ongoing conversation, try starting with a new topic, like sharing what’s good and bad about your day. Start with you or dad, and then the children take their turns too. This habit has helped us open up to each other and become comfortable at the thought of confiding to each other. In some families, if this doesn’t work, they are advised to utilize conversation cards that have topic lists or only games that serve as conversation starters.

 

Family dinners may inspire us to eat healthily.

As a mom, I have control over the type of food choices that my family consumes. I take my time in planning for them because I want them to be healthy, so I prepare meals that are balanced in terms of nutrition and flavor. It has been proven in studies that family dinners contribute to lowering the risk of obesity in kids. This is because when children eat together with the rest of the family, they are inclined to eating healthy food and also avoid smoking and other illicit drugs. Additionally, some people don’t find their food tasty because they eat fast when they’re on the go. Having dinner at home with the presence of loved ones gives you the privilege to enjoy home-cooked food and made with love.

 

It’s who you’re with, not what’s really on the table.

 

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In my experience, you don’t need to be a chef or an expert food planner to be able to come up with a lovely family dinner. Much of what’s excellent with eating together is who you’re with, not the food on the table. There are a lot of recipes you can find in books and even online. Just as long as you give them something healthy and all of you come together at the table and eat, you have been successful in your goal to find meaning in your family dinners. Perhaps one night, you can prepare a simple combination of mushroom soup and some steamed fish, while during the weekends, you can entice the teenagers to be present by prepping their favorite dish – pasta, fries, and baked chicken!

I truly cherish our dinners with the family. I feel and witness the bond that these dinners have blessed us with, and I am so grateful for every single time that all of us get to sit down with our faces seeing each other, smiling happily, and eager to connect.

 

 

Types Of Mental Illnesses One Can Develop During This Pandemic

Mental illness is a condition that affects individuals’ thoughts, emotions, and moods. It can stick for a while, depending on the person’s environment and upbringing. It can negatively impact someone, especially when there are triggering factors. And just like this pandemic situation, there are a lot of things about it that can cause people’s mental illness. Let us take a look at some of the most common types of mental illness one can develop during this health crisis.

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Anxiety Disorders – One misconception of anxiety disorder is that most people think the condition is not that serious. Meaning, it would be a waste of time if one would try and secure a mental treatment for anxiety. That is because some people believe that anxiety is only related to a mild worry. However, they do not know that anxiety disorder rarely appears alone. Usually, it gets diagnosed alongside with depression. It is characterized as an uncontrolled worry that impacts several aspects of people’s life. These include social connection, school, work, as well as sleep.

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Depression – In times where individuals feel emotionally unstable, the possibility of depression is high. But some might not recognize depression instantly. For most parts, it can be due to isolation and loneliness brought by the pandemic situation. Since there are a lot of uncertainties, some individuals may experience confusion and uncomfortability. From there, he soon develops negative behaviors that damage his mental and emotional state. In some unfortunate cases, it gets accompanied by self-harm and thoughts of suicide.

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) – Usually, when people talk about ADHD, the things that come to mind is stereotyped. Most people assume that it is a depiction of a small child bouncing off the walls. However, ADHD is a condition that affects all individuals of any age. It also includes multiple symptoms such as inability to focus, forgetfulness, and restlessness. During this time of crisis, an individual might develop a mental disorder due to social isolation, loneliness, and boredom.

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Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder – For most people, they find this pandemic stressful that they somehow can no longer accomplish anything in a day. But for other individuals, they consider the situation as traumatic. Some people battle with the uncertainty that somehow affects them permanently, especially those who already lost the people they love due to the virus infection. PTSD can get accompanied by other mental illnesses as well. These include anxiety, depression, and grief.

Bipolar Disorder – Bipolar Disorder is not just a compilation of entirely serious mood swings. For people who experience this condition, they cannot control their emotions.  Usually, they get to have unrealistic thoughts that often puts them in danger. People with bipolar disorder can be super happy. Sometimes they engage in a crazy and spontaneous thing without considering the possible damage they can cause to themselves. Living with bipolar disorder isn’t easy because people struggle to find their overall balance.

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Eating Disorders – Perhaps in this pandemic time, people are making fun of how they will entirely look after this whole situation is over. They somehow joke about getting fat or thin. However, it is not the aftermath appearance that causes a problem. People are experiencing an eating disorder, and they somehow can’t notice it because of the timing of the situation. The stress is causing individuals not to take care of their physical health. Unfortunately, that is not a good option, primarily when the virus targets the body’s immune system.

If you think you are experiencing some of these mental health conditions, give yourself a favor, and seek professional help. Take care of your health as much as you can.

What Is Autistic Burnout And What Causes It?

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Much of what took place at the 2019 National Autism Conference was dedicated to getting a clearer understanding of the many things that autism is associated with. The event was graced by world-class speakers that were experts in the field of autism and they gave a thorough discussion of the symptoms and causes of autism, types of autism, and the different experiences that children and adults with autism encounter in their lives. One of these experiences common among this group is known as autistic burnout.

Definition

Autistic burnout is an extreme mental, emotional, or physical fatigue that a person with autism experiences. When this happens, he loses his ability to do the things that he previously can do. Most autistic individuals say that this is probably because of the collective effect of having to deal with a world that is created for neurotypical people. Burnout may particularly impact autistic adults who have great language and cognitive skills and are in school or working together with people who do not have autism.

Causes

Burnout is usually a result of camouflaging or suppressing, a technique wherein autistic individuals imitate neurotypical behavior by utilizing dialogues for small talk, pushing them to maintain eye contact or masking their typical repetitive behaviors. Though these kinds of techniques can assist autistic individuals in performing their jobs, they are often difficult and need enormous effort from the autistic person.

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Another cause may be from sensory overstimulation, like a noisy passenger vehicle; stress related to multiple changes; or from demands that are too hard for them to handle at the same time.

Recovery

Recovering from autistic burnout largely depends on the individual and the impact of the experience is for him. Certainly, the first step is for the autistic individual to remove himself from the situation that has caused him to be ‘burned out.’ This may be as simple as going home to rest from a completely full workday or getting out of a serious discussion. Other autistic people have claimed that their burnout was so severe that the impact on them lasted for years. Autistic burnout may happen more often and become more challenging to recover from as people age.

 

 

Dating Advice During A Global Pandemic

What’s happening in the world right now is entirely terrifying. Every individual gets affected by the Coronavirus. It is a respiratory disease that spreads from one person to another through cough and sneeze. It has no vaccine yet, so the temporary solution, as of now, is social distancing. Every individual should not be with ten persons or more because the possibility of quickly getting infected with the virus is higher.

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With no cure in sight, all people are requested to stay at home. They must follow a home quarantine protocol to keep themselves away from getting infected. For dating individuals, the situation seems like a nightmare. It is already hard for them to get stuck indoors and no way of seeing each other in person. The days go by, and life becomes so stale that the couple could not do anything. To add more damage to the situation, these individuals have nothing to talk about anymore.

Long-distance couples deal with the situation where they feel scared, lonely, and anxious. There is the uncertainty of not knowing when they are going to see and hold their partner again. The particular situation can evoke different kinds of emotions that somehow affect their feelings for each other. So how can this long-distance relationship survive during this global pandemic?

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Just Be There

Couples who stick together and finding time to communicate with each other can survive this global crisis. As long as both are focused on not indulging in the stress of the situation, they can manage to find ways to make better their connection intact. Couples should not allow themselves to feel bored and isolated. Both must not cut contact as it may lead to fading emotional attachments. Therefore, both individuals must reassure and uplift each other emotionally and mentally.

Make Every Moment Counts

Since the world is on lockdown and people are socially distancing, it is vital to make every moment count. For those couples who spend a little bit of extra time with each other through phone and chat, they must consider making adjustments. Both individuals surely have a lot of things to do with their lives. Therefore, they need to set a routine. They must plan on fixing their schedules and avoid making an excuse not to communicate. And once they get a chance to be together, even virtually, couples should value each others’ effort.

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Be Honest

Honesty in the relationship always goes a long way. Yes, there are times that one or both individuals will feel a little bit off in the relationship. In times like this that there is no uncertainty, both may fail to express their feelings in a nice way. Perhaps that is due to the stress that the situation is putting the couples in. So it is better to be honest at all times. It is crucial to acknowledge every detail of emotional changes both partners experience. That way, couples can discuss the issue and also allow themselves to look for solutions to it. Both couples must understand their role in the relationship.

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During this situation, as difficult as it is, couples should remind each other of their love and commitment. Yes, the uncertainty of the health situation is there. But both should be mindful that this is not the right time to lose track of their long-distance relationship responsibilities. It is not the right moment to let go of someone just because they are bored and lonely. It is not okay to lose a relationship over a pandemic crisis. So instead of thinking negatively, both should focus on looking for something to look forward to.

How Does A Child With Autism Impact Family Life?

The Christi family poses for a photo at Joint Base Andrews, Md., April 27, 2017. Michael Christi, far right, son of Jeff Christi and Maj. Rebecca Christi, 799th Medical Group pediatrician, has autism spectrum disorder. The Air Force provides Michael with health and educational services, including Exceptional Family Member Program and Extended Care Health Options, which in turn provide therapies such as applied behavior analogy, speech therapy, and occupational therapy. April is also Autism Awareness Month, which is meant to increase understanding and acceptance of autism. (U.S. Air Force photo by Airman 1st Class Valentina Lopez)

Source: af.mil

It was at the 2017 Autism Conference where medical professionals and other specialists met and shared knowledge and expertise. The event was not only an opportunity for families with autistic family members to learn more about the condition, but it was also an opportunity to get a lot of freebies – free hair cut, free play for kids, and free art shows. Plus, it was filled with law enforcers that were provided by the town to control the crowd and maintain safety and security.

One of the goals of the event was to educate parents and caregivers on the effects of having a child with autism and how this impacts family life.

Family Adjustments

It is vital to acknowledge that family dynamics will ultimately change after the diagnosis. There is no other way around it, but eventually, everyone will have been adjusted to the situation and accept the truth. Going out with the whole family for picnics, holidays, field trips, and the usual family traditions can be challenging when a child with autism is involved.

Accommodations must be chosen so that the child will be comfortable and will not cause any hassle or distribution that may induce tantrums. However, despite these modifications, fun and memories can still be captured, and families must continue doing activities together instead of ceasing to do them because of the difficulties.

Parents’ Adjustments

It’s natural for parents to have big dreams for their children, whether parents are vocal or not about them. When they learn that one of their children (or their only child) has autism, they initially become dismayed and frustrated, and most of them change their minds about what they think about their child. They are often discouraged because the dreams that they had for their child will no longer be realized. However, they should not feel this way.

The truth is, every child is unique in his way – even a child with autism. So while he may be physically or mentally disabled, parents will soon discover that their child has other special personalities and talents. He can be good at painting or drawing; he could be a math genius! Parents must learn how to hone and improve the skills that their children with autism have.

Relationship With Other Children

Parents usually worry because their other children might think that they spend too little time with them and too much time on their sibling with autism. Of course, there’ll be doctors’ appointments and therapy sessions. If the other children are unable to understand the reason for the lesser attention, they are more likely to be affected mentally and emotionally.

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It is therefore important for parents to explain to them that even if they spend time with their sibling because of his condition, it doesn’t mean that they are less loved. It is only because their brother needs more help – and that even they should do their part. There must always be communication for them to understand. They should also be included in the activities that parents have for their autistic child so that they will develop more love and empathy for him.

 

 

What Women Say Vs. What They Actually Mean

 

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In a relationship, women often take everything way too far. Sometimes we demand better understanding because we know that our spouses or significant others will probably understand it in some way. Though I admit, it is way complicated than that because men can ultimately take it seriously. So here is a list of what women commonly say vs. what they actually mean.

 

“I Will Think About It”

No, I won’t. It means I have already decided that’s it’s a NO. Women have this logic that when they say they’ll think about it, it unquestionably means they are not interested in anything that you are offering or asking them.

 

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“I’m Fine!”

Well, keep asking. I will eventually tell you what’s wrong. It’s a woman’s cryptic language that men should be aware of women’s emotions and that something is bothering them. They plainly need you to look deeper and insist on knowing what they honestly feel.

 

“Do Whatever You Want”

Better not to do it. If a man takes this phrase seriously, it will cause tons of trouble. It’s the opposite of agreeing on things. It implies that you are not allowed to do it even if they already received a signal.

 

“I’m Almost Ready”

Now, this one’s common. When women tell their spouses or boyfriends that they’ll be ready in a minute, they can at least do something that will buy their time. It’ll probably take an hour when she says she’ll be all set.

 

“Does This Make Me Look Fat?”

Please don’t answer maybe or yes. As much as we want an honest opinion, we look forward to the answer of NO. We don’t want our significant others to make us feel that we’re not physically good looking.

 

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“We Need To Talk”

When a woman asks a man for a conversation, it means that he needs to listen while she talks. His opinions won’t matter, and suggestions are unacceptable. It merely implies that a woman needs to say something and a man should only have to listen.

 

“What Did You Say?”

I’m not exactly asking. I probably get what you said, and I wanted you to rephrase your statement so we can avoid an argument. Women are considered a game changer so it will be a massive fight if you repeat the upsetting last words you said.

 

“I’m Not Mad”

Honestly, I am. As much as possible, I would want to tell it straight to your face that you made a mistake and I got offended. However, I want you to personally know what’s wrong and ask for forgiveness even if you don’t have any idea about it.

 

“I’m Tired”

I’m not physically exhausted; I just want you to leave me alone. Women have this mental capability to turn a situation into something that will favor them. It’s a runoff phrase to get things out of the way.

 

“Leave Me Alone!”

Don’t you dare leave me! I want you to sit there and watch me while I’m having an emotional breakdown. Women want attention so bad that even if they don’t want you around, you need to see how much they are suffering so you can do something to ease that away.

I’m not generalizing all women with regards to their different responses. However, when men hear these lines, they should at least think twice before doing something out of the ordinary.